Thursday, March 15, 2007

What Hindi Looks like!

This is what Hindi looks like:

थिस इस वहत हिंदी लूकस लिके !!

Pretty awesome, eh? Now, if I could only find a software that allows me to type in English but have the program automatically convert it into any language. Greek, Polish, Russian to name a few.

Now I'm sure they exist, but because I haven't begun my research, I just don't know yet. Growing from there, it's amazing to me how useful technology truly is in this day and age. Sure it's difficult for those that prefer one station for their cheese, (Who Moved My Cheese-fabulous book!) or for the older generations that just prefer snail mail over the likes of the world wide web.

Someone should generate a program for elderly (and it's not called Computers for Dummies!!) Here's an idea: you find a unique bunch of individuals that know computers, you create a "added bonus" for those that purchase the newest Dell, or even Mac (LOVE THEM, WANT THEM!!): I free online "butler." You'd call him the IT BUTLER! He'd be there to walk you through pulling up pictures that have been sent by your granddaughter from your inbox. He'd be able to remote access your system. But that would only be to physically show you how to do whatever it is you're stuck doing. (Sure, strict background checks, strict professional individual need only apply) He/She could have the option of working at home, yadah yadah.

I get in these types of moods ever so often when my mind isn't working on poop, and dirty nails, and brushing teeth, and throwing toys, and running sniffley's, and loving and snuggling, and book reading, and, well, I could just go on and on. But when my mind warps itself into the reality of these club crusty promo's, I really enjoy the peacefulness that it provides. It's as if I'm being reminded that even though I am a SAHM, I'm still "a part of the real world."
I love processing a plan to improve random companies overall navigation and productivity AND sales. You get this internalized feeling of "fix me, fix me." "Make me savvy to the likes of all my consumers out there."

Take last night for example:

My cellular provider, Cingular Wireless/ Ameritech/ Now AT&T followed up with a phone call last night to determine if I was satisfied with the call I had on Monday. It took a few minutes to pull myself back into that particular moment, granted I had two out of three boys yelling at each other over the likes of one of their many small army soldiers. (note to self, spring clean my offspring's daily entertainment) After pulling the memory from "back there," I responded to the likes of this foreign mans questions:

CUS REP: "One a scale of one to ten, ten being the most satisfied, one being the worst, how satisfied were you with the overall previous agent's professionalism."

This continued on and on and on...Starting with a mere:

CUS REP: "I would like to ask you just a FEW (strong tone emphasis on FEW)questions regarding your previous call with 'said agent' on 'said day.'

The crazy thing is each question he asked me, he'd also have to be very detailed and say the same, "on a scale," phrase. I even cut him off unintentionally (due to dealing with my boys) and he said,

CUS REP: "Please allow me to complete the question in it's entirety along with the scale range."

Okay, fair enough, my fault....But after thinking about everything, from the positive feedback I provided with how content I was with the agent from Mondays call, to the negative I provided "professionally" on their poor automated phone system. They must not have CISCO which is an incredible phone system company's should have. The overall flow of CISCO is like a soft babbling brook.

One type of thing Cingular is lacking is that by selecting O it doesn't take you right to the "please wait while we connect you to the next available agent to assist you," phrase. It plays tricks with you. "Please enter your account #, or if you don't have one, please enter your WHATEVER."

Apparently there's been this new law passed in the State of Illinois that when consumers want to speak to an operator, they should have the option to do so immediately by pressing O. Don't know the other details on this stated law, I haven't researched it enough yet. But that was definitely in the back of my head while I was providing feedback to this agent in Where-Ever Land.

After internalizing this, I brought my mind back to the agent's dialogue on
" now, on a scale of one to ten, ten being the most satisfied, one being the least, how satisfied were you with,....."
Would you like to know why?
I'd be happy to tell you.

Because this companies advertising dept is pretty smart. They cover all their tracks. They detail their survey questions so that there isn't anyone that can come back and say that they were "confused" by the words.. Should someone go all Watergate on them and try to smudge statistics and ratings, for example. (well, at least in MY head)

They're also pretty savvy because they don't say the word "negative," they say the word "the very least." Yet they do say the word "Satisfied" twice in the sentence. One time being just after the " very vague negative seed planter of the call." So, your mind hears satisfied twice, and stores it. Therefore subconsciously increasing the odds that us as a consumer will just be lazy and breeze through the survey just to get the guy off the phone after a "few questions." Breeze through and replying to him, "very satisfied, 10."

Makes you think a bit about your own past survey experiences, doesn't it?

So, that my loyal readers, is what launched my mind into the development of the "ONLINE BUTLER."

Welcome to Crustybeef~
What experiences have you had with CUS. SER?
Speaking of pulling things out from the back of my head, here's another one:

If you ever get writing imprinted on a wooden table that you may own, say from your loaf of bread, or a wet envelop, and you can't get it out with soap and water, use a small amount of peanut butter on a paper towel and proceed to "wax on, wax off." (a bit of a run on sentence, but I'm rushing to finish up because I hear my little wonders starting to come out of their dream states from a good nites sleep) It'll shine that word right out of the spot. Just remember to clean up after the peanut butter.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Does the P-Butter really work? I hate Cust service calls, they are annoying and worthless. Great blog, i love getting inside your brain..