Thursday, September 06, 2007

Dreamland Darkness

She's dying and she's surrounded by everyone that she loves.
They're all staring at her, waiting for her to move on.
Her breathing begins to grow rapid.
The fluid now filling up her lungs.
She is scared, but so sick of feeling ill.
She's ready to go.

The last breath is taken.
She closes her eyes.
Then, darkness.
Quiet.
No one coming for her.
Still eternal darkness....

This is the same dream I've had more often than late.
If I could give myself an analysis based on the dream, you'd think I feared death.

Maybe it's due to me being a mother and wife.
Wanting to hold onto everything that is surrounding my life.
Wanting to freeze life from death.
Obviously we all know that's not possible.

I have faith.
I have faith in God.
I have faith in my Christianity upbringing.
I have faith there is a heaven.

But this damn dream-you'd think that I had zero faith.


Welcome To Crustybeef~
Thankfully I know it's just a dream.
But it's one of those that I'll think about all darned day.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Crusty....Dont go!!! We need you!!!We love you!!! Everytime you have that dream hopefully you will hear these words resonating in the background and you will survive to live and love...

BDD

captain corky said...

I dread reoccurring dreams. They suck and I always wake up feeling the same nagging desperate empty feeling. You'll figure it out eventually Crusty.

P.S. The Colts are going to house the Saints.

Anonymous said...

That dream sounds like the lyrics to some Speed-metal song...

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

anon: I LY ANF L'DoDI!

Captain: Saints Plus 7 -does Bigdogg get a bumper sticker if I'm right??

Tex: Feel free to start up your band again, and use these..I'm good for that..just stick my name as lyric writer..CHIII's...

Always,
Crusty~

Portia said...

i am fascinated by dreams, but i think it's very difficult to sort out the true meanings. that one is a bit morbid but that doesn't necessarily mean bad things. i hate that lingering feeling a bad dream leaves you with too!

SOUL said...

i dream of OTHER people dying. i don't know if i've dreamed of ME dying. hmmmm. i wouldn't worry about it though.
i gotcher back crusty!
hmmmph. like that does a whole helluva lot eh?
where's sully boy?

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

Portia: You'd like dnutz and ACS, they're really good at figuring out these types of dreams. I used to dream I was flying..now? Dying..perhaps because I'm more aware of death now that I have children...maybe it's my brains way of saying, QUIT SMOKING!!!

Soul: I promise not to worry about it, so long as you promise to warn me when you dream of my death. YUCK!
You would have my back, I know that without a doubt..you'd hop in your batmobile and head straight to Chicago to have that smoke with me...I wouldn't doubt it.
You sound much more like yourself, my dear Soul!

Always,
Crusty~

SOUL said...

i won't dream of you dying as long as you don't die.
now...lets end the death crap.

and lets go cruisin in the batmobile...but if it's gotta be in chigaco...it's gotta be before it's freezin cold. i have been up there one time... and thought i would freeze to death pumping gas !!!!
burrrrr.

you'll have to fly south for the winter smoke and chokes!

Anonymous said...

I don't think you fear death.

Dreams, especially recurring dreams are our subconcious's way of trying to tell us something. Death in a dream is not a fear of death in reality. It is an illustrated representation of emotions.

I can only guess, but this time of year generates a lot of stress for people, especially with school age children. Your transitioning from summer break to school days, upcoming holiday season, ever evloving relationships and regular adult affairs like bills and whatnot. Maybe a part of you is worried about "slipping away", not being able to keep it all together.

Does it make sense?

Hopefully if you address your emotion about things going on in your life the dreams will stop persisting.

-P

austere said...

Change, transitions, new things.
That's it.