Friday, March 13, 2009

Mingled Moods

While waiting to pick up Brian from the train on Wednesday I witnessed two different things, one that I see all the time when picking him up and one that was a virgin view, a first time experience.

The first is the one I see all the time:

-A man sits in his Hybrid Honda Suv waiting for the train. He always parks in the same spot, across the street from the bank that was held hostage last year, when the result was the disturbed man took his life last year.

But back to Hybrid Honda guy. Because he always parks in the same spot, it leads me to believe that he must arrive early enough in order to pick his unassigned always the same, parking spot. When the train Gates start to go down a block East of where the gates we sit across from, the man will get out of his car, open up his hatch back, pull on his coat, and if raining, grab an umbrella.

The train approaches it's stop in the town that we live in. This particular stop is always full of Liberty and pride and ironically so is this late 50 something year old man. As the train pulls into the station, at that very time the Honda Hybrid man has left his parked car and started walking towards the train. He always walks to the same spot, just outside of the third train car where he'll wait until he sees his forever.


Eventually a woman that he knows steps off the train steps and before doing anything at all, including making eye contact with one another, her hand finds his. They walk, usually silently back towards the Honda, holding hands.



He walks her to the passenger side of the car and opens the door for her. When she's seated, he'll close the car door. He then makes his way over to the drivers side door, and once situated in the drivers seat, you always see both of them turn towards each other and smile at each other.

It amazes me that all this positive energy has been volleyed back and forth between this couple, yet there weren't any words spoken. Nothing physical except for the holding hands. This happens everyday on the 4:11 train in from Chicago.

The other first time observation I made was that same day. A late 90's model cream colored Ford Taurus sedan pulls into the parking spot next to me. A woman in her late 20's or early 30's climbs out of the car and just has that look that all of us have. She's one of us. A SAHM. You can just tell. You just know.

She leans into the backseat from the back door and unfastens her young 9month old. They too make their way towards the approaching train that left the Chicago station at 4:11. They stand back very far back, as far away from that yellow line as possible, the mother's eyes scanning the crowd of people debarking from the train. Finally they see Daddy and the little one's face lights up and squeals from underneath the bundle of her long bonnet hat, and muffin mittens snapped to her pink and purple winter coat.

The young family begins their steps back towards their older model Taurus and at the very moment I look up from my readers digest magazine, this new mom makes eye contact with me and in that brief moment, I felt what she thought. Meanwhile the TV is on in the van, playing Cartoon Network for my three sons. My three sons that are acting rather obnoxiously in the minivan while waiting for daddy to arrive on the train that left Chicago at 4:35.

The new mom looks at me with eyes that long for the time when she herself will have a minivan and lots of little bundles, more then one. She just had that look to her as she smiled so sweetly at me; the crusty mom reading a readers digest.

She was seeing her future and for a moment she felt as though her future had arrived and she was loving it. Her eyes tell it all. She's a stay at home mom, like me, and she cannot wait until the day that she is where I am.

I on the other hand watch her and smile and at that moment she can read my thoughts through my thoughtful gaze as her and her husband lean into the back seat and fasten in their only child together. As Mom climbs behind the drivers seat and Dad climbs into the passenger side (another way to tell a SAHM if you've had enough practice) to make the drive home.

Just watching them I was able to feel how peaceful one child was. How quiet their nights would be after 8pm without three sets of teeth to brush, three faces and hands to wash. How at the supper table their eyes can rest on only one child.
Peace.
Quiet.
One focus.
An interesting thought, a mingling of moods that passed between two SAHM's. I hope for her she'll be there someday, and I know, like I, she'll have the memories of the times it was just one, and how now, it's something that she wouldn't change for the world.
Being out numbered is a nice thing when you can vividly recall memories of one.

************************************
So, I was all set to go into more details of recent thoughts, and events but our close neighbor friends showed up unannounced about 7:00pm with some beer and crown royal. They were out at Muldoons tonight for a date night-HEY! I !!-bet my cousin saw them there!!-and decided to stop here for some more cocktails and fun company until mom in law brings their three home from dinner and a movie..

Needless to say my mind has been altered and unless I want to get summoned with a DWB, I should just stop the typing and finish up the Bud Lights that are calling my name.

As my friend Susan would say,
HAVE NO SHAME.

Will talk about my MMR experience another day.

Besides, beer helps decrease side affects of the birth control pill.

15 comments:

austere said...

Such a warm fuzzy post, Crusty.

Thank you.

I'd just lost my temper- and how I hate that. Your post was a salve.

Rick Rockhill said...

I always enjoy your refreshing perspective on things Crusty!

KathyA said...

And I look at this from the OTHER side: the SATGM. Our chicks have all flown -- (but do come frequently home to roost) and have chicks of their own! :)
People watching is sooo neat!

Anonymous said...

I've never had the memories of just one child because there were always two from the very beginning. Am I complaining....not at all but it would have been nice once in a while not to have two babies crying at once, two babies teething at the same time, two toddlers to toilet train together and....you get the picture. Yeah one at a time would have been nice but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Kstro said...

Hey you,
Loved the first story especially...I wonder if they were married for a long time? Would like to ask them what their secret is for such peaceful exchanges...oh wait...no kids, that's right. :)
I was at Muldoons on Friday, my friends band was playing, and I had many many vodkas. It was a great night. Next time you need to come!
Love you!
Katie

happyone said...

I loved this post. Three different stages of life. Great writing as always. :-)

Anonymous said...

Great post...as usual

Portia said...

Nice stories to share...I hope you enjoyed your beers:)

Anonymous said...

These are great glimpses... and symbols of how to communicate with your spouse.

Sounds like the northwestern line. My memory of the train is fading...

Anonymous said...

Great post!!!! I stand behind that woman almost everyday and she seems like a nice person. It is great to see that chivalry isnt dead. I am going to ask her for the secret formula so I can make sure that you and I have that everlasting love till death do us part!!!!!!!!! anf

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

...or until one of us gets sand in between our toes and leaves the lotion on the porch. :L)anfily2. l'dodi. but seriously, perhaps the secret is just a simple thing of respect, gratitude, forgiveness and acceptance..
we're there..except we're always holding Yo Gabba Gabba's hand... :)

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

Kristin: Trains make for great people watching..I've always wanted to take the train from Chicago to Florida..although From what I hear,..you get a lot of strange people..

I'll fit right in.

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

Portia: Oh I did...The guys broke into the crown royal and my girlfriend and I sat and guzzled beer like two girls out of hs behind the bleachers.

class act. :)

worth it!

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

WW: CHV's and what'd the surgeon say? Lemme know so I can get you the high quality Anesthesiologists. Kelly pk soon?

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

Happy One: you are so right. it's interesting and all of it is just so full of feelings..I love being able to remember the time when it was one, and I look forward to being with Brian as empty nesters, G-d willing.