Thursday, June 14, 2007

These Are The Moments...


Sounds of conversations off in the distance:

"What do you want to have for dinner tonight..?"
"What to eat for lunch.."
"What I forgot to pick up at the store before coming into work.."
"Trying to figure out time management with two childrens activities.."
"The annoyances of shuffling between soccer games and gymnastics.."

Conversations overheard in the background mean nothing to her now.

Foreign as if being spoken in different tongues.


The noises a constant reminder of the hellish pathway she's found herself on.


Ever so silent clip clops "appear" down the glimmering sterile four squared hallway.

Fading sounds of voices and footsteps overpowered by the incessant sounds of the darkness now embracing her.


Listening, hands clasped, eyes focused on one thing-

Rising and falling rising and falling rising and falling rising and falling...

The gateway of floods permanently soaking her soul

Flooding every part of her heart

How many more times will it break?

Over and over again the breaking tears a part her entire being-but she wills the pain away

Her soul, her heart, her life, living off the now prolific darkness that surrounds her

The rising and falling rising and with the "beep..beep..beep..beep..beep..beep"

She prays

She cries

She wishes to transfer life into the darkness

She blankets this new path with tears far more intense than ever imagined.

She hopes for the chance to gaze again into the eyes of her unconditional love

A transfer of esprit, breath, entity, survival, something please, anything- into the inanimate object before her.

Rising falling rising falling rising falling...:

Welcome To Crustybeef~
It's hard, I understand, but the simplest solution is to just "PDWA!"


Anonymous said...

It is common at my inlaws' house to have AT LEAST two conversations going at one time. If you're not engaged in either discussion it is a bit much to take (especially hearing several people talk with strong opinions/feelings/frustrations, etc.)... ANYWAY... One day I was caught spacing out, but while holding a strained look on my face. My father-in-law asked if I was feeling OK. I laughed and asked him if it ever bothered him that it is always like that. Even if you are engaged in one of the ongoing conversations, you are GUARANTEED to be (what some may deem) rudely interrupted by people in the other conversation... Whenever I feel a night like that coming on I usually brace myself and prepare to mentally walk away.

~ Kiki

Anonymous said...

I saw and read about this story via myspace. So sad. People just don't know when to walk away. It's a terrible thing. Babies are convenient victims, silent victims. I cannot imagine this family's nighmare. I truly pray for them.

~ Kiki


I agree with you Kiki...
PDWA is all they have to do.

Anonymous said...

I had a vert hard time watching that. It makes me sick to think that the lady who did this to the poor child has gotten off. I cant imagine what the parenst are going through. It breaks my heart.


Anonymous said...

One mother admitted to me that she had a hard time walking away from her crying toddler son. Her husband told her to just walk away, close the door and let him have his tantrum alone in his room (crying, kicking, screaming, you know, the good stuff). She said she had to walk away. Finally she heard him gag and then throw up (sorry for the graphic nature of this description), but his cries were relentless. He was fine. This particular tantrum was the worst kind. After he calmed himself down she felt more confident in how to handle the situation. "Old school" methods would have ended that tantrum badly. I find comfort knowing that we mothers are more informed on how to handle situations like that. There is no need to beat our kids into submission.

~ Kiki


If only there was a hotline a free place to call an easy number to remember for any one put in charge of children.
a site to give tips exclusively for "pdwa"

I know how hard it is when you have a rather whiney baby..and there have been many times that I've had to put him down in his crib for a few minutes for my own sanity..but for those that are reaching the next level..there should be someone they can call 24/7.

JWiessie said...

K, now my heart is broken…I found the myspace page too where baby kaleb has info.

So sad. He’s in Tampa , staying in the same hospital that I was born in. I even get the paper, I cant believe that I missed that day’s paper…it was on the front page. I didn’t know about this until you sent it… its just so upsetting… so many thoughts race thru my mind…mostly I’m thankful for my kids & that they are in good health …

Anonymous said...

That is so sad...totally breaks my heart. Thanks for reminding me why I stay home and how precious little children are :)

Anonymous said...

Thank you for forwarding that video. I cried as I watched it.
You are a very talented writer. Thanks for sending me this info. Now I'll check your blog on a regular basis. You should think about doing a column for the local paper!

austere said...

I need to go and check what happened. In a minute.

austere said...

Oh God. I'm so sorry.

Anonymous said...

Yes Katie, I am also very glad I can stay at home with my little one. It's sad, but things like this make me trust people less and less. I pray for Kaleb and all the other babies who have died from this, the ones who suffer from this, and for all their families. It is so tragic and to think it can be so easily avoided - walk away!

Anonymous said...

I think there is a 24/7 hotline. Look for the local Exchange Club Center for the Prevention of Child Abuse. I'm sure they can give anyone the national toll free number for parents who need to "walk away."
Since I read your post and the comments I am NOT going to view the video. I know I can't handle it.