I've had the flu.
When I get sick, like the sick that I've had, it puts me in a rather cranky mood. Some of you would say it's because I'm unable to control my body, to will my body to get over it quicker, and heaven forbid that I actually have to sit (on the toilet) more than 3x a day while I wait for this here viral crapper to dispose of himself from my intestines. Meanwhile he'll leave my body and bobbing around in the dark sewers, just lurking until it's time to infect another poor Chap. Chapped it is, I sent Bigdogg out for the suggested adult tush wipes the other day, ahhhhhhhhhhhh, thank you for that! (thank you, those of you that offered me with that tush saving grace suggestion!!)
Besides the Bum Runs, my inconsistent friend since I've been 16, you know her as Pam, decided to come over last Friday. But 9 days later, she's still here. Did I miss the wedding invitation, or save the date card for Pam and Sire Bum Runs? Not fun to have this type of combo party whatsoever.
Because of my strong personality, and the fact that I get itchy when things are out of my control, even though if you ask Bigdogg, he'd tell you I have quite improved on that area, compared to my manic state back when I was pregnant with our first child, Jackson. All in all, anytime it involves Pam and the flu, it makes me very crabby.
It would be NICE to have a better idea about Pam, for had I known, I'd have refrained from stepping on the weight scale mid afternoon last week. If I'd known she was coming, I'd have avoided it all. Yes, I know you're not supposed to weigh yourself mid afternoon, but, I'll tell you why I did it:
I figured, 'what's the big deal, I've been eating healthy, cut out the Starbucks, no grazing off the boys plates, no eating while standing up thinking that it's an improvement. I've refrained from heavy creamer in my coffee, nothing but that and bottled water with the occasional glass or two or three of crystal light. I've had veggies, I've had yogurt, sugar free jello, whole grain bread, turkey with low sodium, basically I've been eating so healthy that even when my nose would discover the separate food chain of McDonald's, my stomach would rumble in disgust. '
I MUST HAVE LOST WEIGHT!'
So, I climb on the scale, mid afternoon, remembering to deduct the difference of overage, and after holding my breath, because naturally I think it'll make a difference with things, I glance down, and see that my weight hasn't changed what so ever. After I threw the scale down the stairs, and put a pretty big hole in the wall from my generic version of a CHI hair brush, I sat down and cried.
I cried for no reason, and because I couldn't figure out why I was crying, it made me cry even more. What the hell was going on with me?
I figured it out later on that day, when darling Pam arrived with quite a load of luggage at my doorstep. So that's where the weight and tears came from!!
You see, I don't worry about tracking her as I had to previously, even though my attempts at tracking her, weren't very resourceful, mind you, as she'd throw me off pretty much each and every time. Having had my tubes tied back in November when the angry cyst said goodbye to his home, I really don't worry myself too much about Pam's GPS program anymore. She'll get here when she gets here.
No need to count any other thing, but deck of cards in Vegas,..I'm Just kidding!
Although this time, it would've been useful to track this Pam, being that the scale failed me and had I KNOWN she was coming, I'd have stayed clear of any weight glaring items, but it doesn't work that way for me, so instead, I have spent the past week fighting the flu with a rather arousing appetite, and stuffing my face with Gino's East Pizza, Starbucks coffee, Cans of Coke (I don't drink Soda/Pop!!) and putting all things bad into my mouth, any and everything that normally would have made my skin throw up hair follicles, thinking that maybe this chocolate piece will help ease the cranks.
Things are returning to normal, finally, and today my first visitor wasn't the cold oval dude (THE TOILET!). But I'm still cranky, so I will give you some thoughts and maybe if you're lucky, one picture, this is about things I just don't quite get, or understand:
Coming from someone that loves spicy and chocolate, when I got this flier in the mail last week, I had to re-read it a few times. I finally shook my head with a spice and a sweet BLAH IN HEAVEN! I am in no way interested in ordering Tabasco Spicy Chocolate for Valentines day, nor do I request that anyone send me some. This dark chocolate spiced with Tabasco Pepper Sauce is not welcome in this home!!
You interested?Really? Uh, okay, if so, please call 1-800-634-9599 and provide them with the
USE CODE: CHOC, and the item is #07765 and they're about $13 per sleeve. For more viewing pleasure, go to http://www.tabasco.com/.
Tabasco isn't paying me to promote this, I just figured there's someone out there truly interested in ordering, and to save time and my ever delicate cranky mood, I felt it was necessary to just put it all out there for you.
The Next Item that I just don't understand?
MY NICOR GAS BILL:
Monthly Customer Charge 8.85
First 20 Therms 20 @ $0.1473 2.95
21 - 50 Therms 30 @ $0.0579 1.74
Over 50 Therms 254.5 @ $0.0519 13.21
Environmental Cost Recovery 110.73 @ $0.0027 = .30
Environmental Cost Recovery 193.77 @ $0.003 = .58
Franchise Cost Adjustment .30
Transportation Service Credit 304.5 Therms @ $-0.0102 = -3.11
Customer Select Charge 5.77
The bold green lines are the items I question. Now before I go into my ramble, I have to make it clear that I do understand how to read my statements. I'm one of those that study the statements each month, including my bank statements, looking for mistakes, or searching for new add ons that I didn't read about in an updated Terms and Conditions pamphlet that they mailed out.
I've uncovered many errors in the past, and have been the victim(?) of fraudulent activities on our personal checking account, so, I study things.
I even study medical bills.
I request itemized billing because they have been known to charge for things that the patient wasn't ever even given.
Or they double charge. Sorry guys, but that is insurance fraud, and I would notify my provider if there is a discrepancy.
Take the time when I had Benjamin by c-section, they charged me for morphine 4X and/or doses. Not a big deal, except that I was wearing a purple band showing that I am allergic to that drug. So, did they give me the medication? Which is a big no-no, and maybe that's why it took me three and one half weeks to finally have a normal poop? Or did they just have an oops, 4X?
Or perhaps an attempt to try and slip the charge under the nose of the patients insurance because why would I be smart enough to follow up with that, after all, I have no time for that drama, being that my nipples were cracking from breast feeding, my shirts leaking moons over NOT My Miami circles on my favorite chill wear. My moods were up and down because of the hormonal shifts, not to mention I was craving a bowel movement like you wouldn't believe. So how would I possibly have time to research these things?
Back to Nicor and the first of the two lines I highlighted in green: I apparently am paying almost $9 a month to our gas company because I have a meter attached to the garage of our home. The meter that they need to determine how much gas we use monthly. The meter that they request that I electronically submit a monthly meter read, and on occasion, you'll see a woman or man drive by, in a four door white 2007 Ford Focus, music loud, a cup of Joe in one hand, they'll hold up a zapper and electronically read my meter without ever setting foot outside of their car.
But don't forget, they also charge based on an estimate of monthly use (of gas) or until I electronically submit them with the numbers that are shown within the dials of the meter that gives them the information to rightfully charge a consumer. To pay them for their gas.
So, I'm paying for a tool that gives them the necessary information in order to charge me not only for gas, but for the necessary taxes, plus a FOR EVERY X, you are charged additionally THIS AMOUNT, for your therms.
That's $108 a year. Pardon me if I seem stingy, but it just doesn't make any sense to me.
The other line in green, is a monthly charge that is based on the average cost of gas, that I have to pay, because I switched to a different gas provider. Now this gas provider, Interstate Gas Supply, promises to lower your gas statement, by providing you with gas of a lesser cost. Only Nicor then, charges me a certain fee monthly based on their cost of gas, because, as they told me, they are "storing the gas that I would be using if I were with them, (so basically they're storing my gas, but the gas that belongs to NICOR), in a storage location should I decide to switch back to Nicor, and until then, they are storing my gas, because if I did switch back and they didn't charge to store my gas-their gas-I'd have no gas."
It just doesn't make sense.
Plus I pay taxes on those charges, plus they tax me for my gas, so basically on an average monthly range of just gas-heat alone, my bills are around $275+ a month. Keep in mind that's just for gas. We still receive statements monthly for electric, sanitary/sewer, water, phone..la-yadah layadah la-yadah...
Maybe I should send them a bill for the steps I take to walk outside to my meter and the energy I use to send the information over the world web electronically because after all, that is also a tool.
I just don't get it.
Finally, the last of my IJDGIt's,...
You know what? This post has gone on too long, and I'll save you the agony of my third and final I just don't get it. I will say it pertains to Dr. Phil, and I have lost all respect for that man, and the picture he's trying to paint..shame on him. He's perfect I guess, and so is his wife, and they have provided a perfect upbringing for their children.
Welcome To Crustybeef~
I can be feisty when I'm sick and with Pam, and just well, Have A Day.