Sunday, November 02, 2008


Any single one of us out there that has a child, or loves candy, or has grandchildren,say lots of children on the street, or in a complex or unit, or friend's children, whatever the case with children involved no matter what category out there, Children almost everywhere around me received Too Much Candies! TMC's! Or, TOO MUCH CANDY, TMC!

What to do with all this candy? After recognizing that not one, but two and beyond children actually asked the door host for more pieces, I saw that with many door ringers Friday evening! There wasn't a lot of older kids this year, my local HS had a playoff game Friday night, so, that eliminated quite a bit of those kids where the bells are set to stop ringing per police order not past 7:00pm. Now, if you don't want to give candy you are to leave your porch light off to notify the lurkers not to bother to walk up the driveway. Makes sense, right? Then you're not able to see the piss ants that throw crap at your door because for once it's not because we live in a
Co-Exist house! (Just kidding by the way, gosh!) But seriously, you're not to turn on your porch light if you're not giving candy, so anyone that does mess with your door or home, is far more difficult to see.

The hours were from 4:00-7:00pm. By 3:45pm you had the mommies with the little pixies, and pea pods and oldest child at the Backyardigan stage phase, so of course you're more then happy to start your giving early, right? I did, I love seeing the wittle bits all dressed up trying to ask for candy bits! It's too cute!

I was a jack ass though because from 5:00-6:30ish I was out with my boys and a bunch of neighborhood friends. After stopping at relatives homes, we returned home, I turned OFF the halloween lites and FRONT PORCH LITE so that no one could see my green luminaries glowing witch figures, and cackling scary crow skeleton that had a purple shirt and pants, my pink spiderweb I attached to our outside kitchen window, with orange lite up spiders, and a string of black widow light ups along an arch of the wall between the outside kitchen window and dining room window-per instruction of Sullivan. Where-ever they wanted the decorations, we placed them. It was challenging for me to just leave everything out of what I would consider, "in it's right place," where as when they placed the decorations throughout our home inside and the few we placed outside, it was a look you'd see by the interior design firm called, "Creations by 247."

But, I left it as they placed it, because I want them to know that I really like their idea's, so long as they're safe, what's the issue with window stickies in a circle in one corner of the big front room picture window? They're learning how to respect, and I am learning how to be a better mom and less about my visions for mundane things." You catch yourself all of a sudden in patterns that you're not happy with. It could be for a number of reasons, but no matter, it's change and when it's negative change, for me it takes awhile to get out of. Strictly speaking with new foreign patterns when involving my children.

New growths I'm unaware of, new changes, school work, sleep over (literally Jackson just had his first nonfriendfamily member over for a sleep over Saturday night, and I was a nervous FREAKSHOW! Just ask Brian, feel free to ask him in the comments field, he's more then welcome to tell you. I just am so concerned with making a child feel comfortable, and I still remember feeling what it was like to experience my first few sleepovers on both sides, as the invitee and the inviter, so I channeled my former emotional feelings from that time, and tried very hard to implement situations that didn't cause any negative emotional feelings from either child), teeth falling out, climbing out of cribs, front flips and language speech therapy, hives, tempers, stubborns, sensitives, homework. You know what I mean? Okay, if you don't, well, that's awesome, and if you wanna feel like that but don't yet, you will some day, trust me! Basically I just tried to make sure the slumber party went well.

I think it did.

BUT!! No matter how much candy I fed each child at our slumber house Saturday night, after I had spent earlier throwing out the misfit candies, I felt their tears as I discarded the tiny torn tootsie rolls, or the more then I like unwound smarties, the stuff that looked crumpled, the misfits. Sorry guys, I hope you're not hurt, and that you're not somewhere in Sid's room! No matter how much candy these boys ingested this weekend, we still had too much.

Remember, I was gone a good portion of the time, therefore we had my remaining candy to mix in too! I figured it was time to come up with some ideas in regards to this "TMC" issue before I have to dump them, to make room for Christmas coins that aren't made containing 'contamination' written in an I-SPY sort of way on the lapel of the pirate. AHOY!

With my half decaf hazelnut and caffeine cinnamon hazelnut cup of coffee later the next day, and thinking back to conversations with many moms and dads that I strode the roads and sidewalks with, many of the males with their "mugs of Joe," "say it ain't so," they definitely needed a plumber after the fourth refill of that "frothy white and golden coffee," I came up with some ideas:



1. There's one, keep it all and eat your favorite types out of your children's piles. Stick them with the soul skittles, or laffy taffys, dum dum suckers, or whatever is your least favorite type of candy, black licorice. You eat it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. Allow them to pick 5 pieces of candy on the first day following Halloween, and then from everyday forward 3 pieces max. By then you should have the candies gone in time for the Easter Cadbury Cream Eggs.

3. Dump half of the remaining lot of candy into one big bowl, to avoid the fighting of the children over which plastic pumpkin held their candy, and make it a free for all for everyone in the family.

4. Stick your significant other with half of the candy, but the crappy stuff and have him take it with him to work, at least you won't feel bad dumping it out! Let the employees carry that responsibility. Unless of course they actually like the 'b rated candy dumped from the person with the kids' lot. Time to remote access their email inbox!

5. Be nice to your significant other's coworkers, and send them to their place of work with half of your loot that balances 50/50 good versus crap candy.

6. Bring more then half of your own child's loot to work for yourself!

7. If any of your children have birthdays that fall in November or October, pushing it beyond December 6Th, make it a party favor with your b rated stuff.

8. Party bags with the 50/50 good versus crap, or even just all good!

9. Do nothing with it, just stare at it and will it away.

10. Make a composite out of it somewhere in your home, or around outside in the yard-mice love peanut butter!


12. Make your children bundle all of their candy up, make them rake HUGE piles of leaves in your yard, or as many as their little arms may rake, assuming you're in an area that has leaves falling down, if not, raking sand or plucking cacti could work too. When the physical labor is done (Ooh, they could clean out your fireplace to help get it ready for WINTER), have them place their big pile of candy around it, almost like a shrine, say goodbye to it and call out to the : "GREAT "TMC" PUMPKIN, YOU BLOCKHEAD!" "COME TAKE TONITE ON THIS EVE, THE EVE AFTER HALLOWEEN'S SPOOKING HAS ENDED, TAKE THIS AS A THANK YOU FOR ALL THAT YOU'VE GIVEN TO ME THROUGHOUT THIS YEAR. COME TAKE IT, COME TAKE IT, WE WANT YOU TOO, YOU'RE DEAR!" Then they leave their bundles in a heap near the designated area and in the morning, there lays a small gift in place of the candy. You'll have taken the candy in the middle of the night, like you do when you're assisting Santa with his work and cookies, and you'll have helped out the GREAT "TMC" PUMPKIN, with some small gifts instead. TOOTHBRUSHES or APPLES A suggestion. Then you must chose from the options above as to how you'll get rid of the candy. INGEST IT OR TRASH IT, WORK IT OR GIFT IT?

13. THE GREAT "TMC" PUMPKIN scenario only they don't get left gifts, they're giving all their candy to the "TMC" PUMPKIN!

14. Call different centers, or schools, programs or food pantries, perhaps shelters even, and see if they accept donations. Have your child divide half of their candy, all the bad misfits thrown out, and you and your child sharing half their candy half of all their favorites and everything not thrown out, and deliver it to the place that you've chosen.

15. Give The Entire Loot to a Place In Need. Not every child had the opportunity to trick or treat this year due to any different reason. Make others happy.

16. Fill in your blanks, What are some others?

I hope you had a good weekend!
I'm quite tired and compliments of our FALL BACK TIME, I'm ready for slumber! This time change always jacks with us and our kids!


The Window Watcher said...

You came up with SIXTEEN ways to get rid of candy. I have a feeling M&M/Mars won't go out of their way to hire you anytime soon.
Great post.....hope you're feeling better.


The Window Watcher said...

You came up with SIXTEEN ways to get rid of candy. I have a feeling M&M/Mars won't go out of their way to hire you anytime soon.
Great post.....hope you're feeling better.


Kelly Jene said...

Good on you. Wow, that's some creative stuff. Most years we dump it all in a community bowl and share it. Nothing b-rate makes it in. I just don't trust it and it never tastes good anyway.

This year however, we didn't trick or treat. We went to a party where we ate their candy and came home empty handed. Just like I like it. :)
Love ya!

Susan's Snippets said...

CB - I am all over doing number 14. I, fortunately, with older kids, don't have to deal with piles of candy and the small amount we had left, my son, (STILL unemployed - somebody need a smart, creative 20 year old to work for them???) came over for dinner last night and polished off most of it. Something to be said for youth and the metabolism of a guy.


Cheryl said...

When Em was a little one she was so torn between going out and staying in to give out candy. She liked looking inside of people's' houses from their doors more than anything. She'd start up conversations and never want to leave. And, she had no interest in her candy the next day. It was weird. That lasted a long time. I wasn't home this year and so no candy. It's been a good thing.

Anonymous said...

A local dentist is collecting the excess candy to send to the troops. I thought that was a great idea....gets rid of the extra, and gives the troops a little piece of home.
D :)

Gypsy said...

I like the idea of #14 and #15. Maybe even a hospital would allow some of the kids that are in there with less serious illnesses to have some candy, especially as they would have missed Halloween and trickor treating.

All those children on sugar overload can't be good for anyone...*cringe*

SOUL: said...

i want candy!