Tuesday, April 27, 2010


I'm sure some of you have met her. If you're a part of my world, you may have heard about her, dealt with her, who knows with her.

Ironically her name came from Ben's language delay. Ben has 1 fear.
Yes, just 1 fear.

He'll jump off stairs, fall face first onto our concrete driveway and not shed a tear, but when it comes to using the bathroom for number 2, forget about it.

Yes, I know, that's an actual phobia for some.
Yes, I know, there are books I can find on how to help your child overcome their fear of pushing out the poop

It didn't start off that way. It took one visit from "CONNIE PATIENCE" that jacked up the future of all his poops to the present point in time.

Every visit to the potty has him in utter fear of "Connie Patience," and he will act as though he is deal with constipation. Only it's a normal movement.

The fear although funny with how he says it, "Mommy, me no yous have Connie Patience. Me get a dicker for Connie Patience, okay Mommy? Okay?"

How can you not feel bad for someone when they dub poop and stickers words that you can 0only hope you'll remember someday to embarrass him in front of his future wife.

But I don't think I'll go as far to tell her how I'm able to calm him down. As he works on the pushing (I feel like a labor and delivery nurse: "push Ben, push, you can do it. Breathe and push down, tuck your chin down, push..) I sit in front of him and wrap my arms around him in a hug wishing so much that I had some of those old swine flu masks laying around.

He has one fear, but thankfully his fear is far from what his own Mom experiences.
I wonder how he'd say diarrhea, if I asked him?

1 comment:

austere said...

You're a riot, Crusty.
Would more bananananas help?